1 Samuel 16:1
The LORD said to
Samuel, "How long will you mourn for Saul, since I have rejected him as
king over Israel? Fill your horn with oil and be on your way; I am sending you
to Jesse of Bethlehem. I have chosen one of his sons to be king."
One of my favorite witticisms is, “Where biology fails, God
prevails!” Some of us are lucky enough to have wonderful grandparents, parents
and siblings.
Others….not so much.
In my ministry, as well as in my personal life, I have seen
the consequences of abuse, neglect, abandonment and rejection. I have seen
mothers chose men over their children, fathers walk away from responsibility, and children blame their parents for their own mistakes. I've seen partners who leave without a second thought to the pain they are causing those they leave behind. I
have also seen the internal struggle that rages inside those who search themselves
for some shortcoming or defect. The one that makes
them unlovable to those who should love them the most.
Let me tell you, it isn’t pretty.
There is a place in the heart that cries out for a love that
should be freely given, but is withheld. There is a place in the psyche that
tries to create logic from an illogical situation, but fails. And there is a place in the soul
that mourns the loss of connection, the loss of affection; the place where
self-blame lies.
But why do we mourn? Why do we mourn when God so clearly
says, “I have chosen someone else for that position. How long will you mourn
what is lost, and ignore what I have ordained to replace it?”
I believe that biological connections are important. I
believe knowing from whence you came sheds light on things like genetic
predispositions, appearances, quirks and predilections. But it does not
necessarily define who your family is. Those you define as family should be
those who love you, believe in you and support your dreams. They should be
those who meet your need with their ability without condition or resentment. Those
who are not only willing to be there for you in your time of need, but do so
with a heart that is grateful for the opportunity, expecting nothing in return.
In this passage, God is telling Samuel to let Saul go, stop
mourning the loss of him and move on to the person He had chosen to fill the
position of King of Israel. God didn’t want Samuel to keep holding on to
something that he had already cut loose!
So, today I ask you… how long will you mourn?
And when will you accept the person into your life that God
has chosen to fill in the blank…
